Becoming a surrogate parent is a wonderful way to help a couple with fertility issues to become parents. Surrogates are also compensated for their time in figures up to the tens of thousands. Surrogate parenting is not for everyone, however, and women should weigh all the risks and possible complications before agreeing to become a surrogate parent.
Misconceptions
There is some confusion surrounding the topic of surrogate parenting. Some common misconceptions about surrogate parenting involve financial compensation, how a surrogate parent is matched with a couple, and how easy the process is for a woman. Some surrogate parents also incorrectly believe that they give birth to a couple's child and can never involved in the parents' or the child's life again.
The Facts
A surrogate parent's help is enlisted by a couple that cannot have children naturally or through fertility treatments such as in-vitro fertilization or hormone therapy. The surrogate parent is hired for her womb, where she will carry the couple's baby to term.
A surrogate parent has the opportunity to be a part of a family's life for years after the birth. It is not like adoption, where all rights to communications are forsaken. Surrogate parents are encouraged to keep in contact with the family after the birth and often become an important part of the family.
Financial compensation for surrogate parenting depends on a variety of factors, including your state, how many times you have been a surrogate parent and how many children you carry for the family. The compensation also depends on whether you go through an agency or locate a couple privately. compensation for surrogate parenting usually ranges from $20,000 to $40,000. Medical and travel expenses are usually paid for by the agency or by the parents.
Surrogate parents can find a couple in need through agencies for surrogate parenting. Many agencies allow the surrogate parent to choose a couple rather than be assigned one. A small number of agencies assign couples to surrogate mothers. If a surrogate parent decides not to use an agency, the parent can find a couple through advertisements or word-of-mouth. It might be a couple that the surrogate parent knows personally.
The process can take an emotional and physical toll on a woman. While some women consider surrogate parenting for the financial compensation, the reality of the emotional, physical and time commitment must be considered.
Risk Factors
There are a number of risks associated with surrogate parenting that women should consider before becoming a surrogate parent. The surrogate parent will need to undergo fertilization treatments to become pregnant and these treatments are not always easy and can take some time. Also, the older the surrogate parent is, the higher risk the pregnancy will have
Most agencies will screen for women who are obese, smokers, alcoholics or substance abusers, since these pose great risks to a healthy pregnancy.
Also, there is always a risk for a miscarriage or the decision to terminate the pregnancy, and the surrogate parent must prepare herself emotionally for that possibility.
Women can be at risk for postpartum depression after giving birth, and this emotional roller coaster can be exacerbated by the couple taking their new baby away from the surrogate parent. Unfortunately, there have been cases where the surrogate parent becomes so emotionally attached to the newborn that she refuses to give up the baby. Surrogate parents are encouraged to attend support groups and counseling, as well as communicate with the couple as to how the surrogate parent can stay involved in the child's life.
Benefits
There are also benefits associated with being a surrogate parent. The compensation is usually generous enough so that the surrogate parent can live off of it for the duration of the pregnancy, if not longer. The surrogate parent will also receive free medical care and treatment. All travel expenses are usually paid for by the couple.
There is also the benefit of helping a couple conceive. Surrogate parents are sometimes the only way a couple can have a child, and the surrogate parent will have the privilege of helping a couple start a family. The bonds that are made during a surrogate pregnancy can sometimes last for life.
Time Frame
The time frame of being a surrogate parent can be as little as one year. This would include signing up with an agency and/or locating a couple, being screened, becoming pregnant and carrying the baby to term. The time frame varies greatly with each pregnancy and depends on a variety of factors. For example, if the surrogate parent has difficulty becoming pregnant, this will lengthen the time frame. Also, the time invested in counseling before and after the pregnancy can lengthen the time frame. Surrogate parenting has the possibility of becoming a lifelong endeavor if a relationship is maintained between the surrogate and the family.
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