Dr. William Sears is a world-renowned author of child care and parent education. He and his wife Martha have eight children and ran a successful pediatric practice for many years. Sears' "The Baby Book" (Little, Brown, 1993) has been called the "Baby Bible" by hundreds of thousands of readers and fans worldwide. In this book Sears discusses the challenges of getting your baby to sleep, getting him into a sleep routine, and many other great nighttime tips that will help you and your baby get a good night's rest.
Nighttime Parenting
Dr. Sears understands that parents are tired and need to sleep and also need their baby to sleep at night, however, he also respects and points out that babies have unique nighttime needs. Babies also enter in to sleep differently than adults do, so there are many tips that should be considered when using the Sears method to getting your baby to sleep. Nighttime parenting, says Sears, is about developing an approach to "create a sleep-inducing environment that allows sleep to overtake the baby--both in going to sleep and in staying asleep" (see Resources).
Facts of Infant Sleep
Dr. Sears wants parents to understand the way an infant sleeps so that they can relate to their child and have more patience while they are working on encouraging a healthy sleep habit for their baby. Babies enter into a light sleep before they go into a deep sleep, whereas adults can go directly from being awake to being in a deep state of sleep. When parents put the sleeping baby down too soon, he wakes up because he wasn't actually in that deep state of sleep yet. From here Dr. Sears suggests repeating your method, whether that is rocking, or pacing or whatever your nightly ritual is that works. Wait until your baby's "hands unfold, and the arms and limbs dangle weightlessly"-- this is when he is in deep sleep and you can put the baby down in his crib and walk away. Remember that the light sleep period lasts about 20 minutes. This is when it is crucial to be patient and not rush putting the baby down too soon, for he will most likely awaken, says Sears.
Babies reenter the phase of light sleep many times throughout the night. Sears suggests that parents do not let the baby cry it out but instead enter their room and "lay a comforting hand on your baby's back, sing a soothing lullaby," or talk lightly to her. Sears says babies have shorter sleep cycles and more arousal periods. He believes that babies are "wired with sleep patterns to awaken easily in the early months when their nighttime needs are the most intense but their ability to communicate them is most limited."
Sears says the medical definition for sleeping through the night in infant stage is only five hours. He also says that babies need 14 to 18 hours a day of sleep from birth to six months and 12 to 14 hours from six months to two years of age.
Conditioning Your Baby to Sleep
Dr. Sears says that sleep is not a state you can force your baby into, it must happen naturally. The role of the parent is to make sleep an attractive experience, and one that is expected by the baby. Dr. Sears also says that for at least the first six months of your baby's life, letting her cry herself to sleep is not a wise choice because you are risking your chance at losing your baby's trust. Here are the steps Sears suggests to help your baby get ready for sleep:
1) Make the daytime as peaceful as possible. Holding and soothing the baby frequently during the day keeps your baby mellow and more ready for an easier sleep at night. If your baby is having frequent fussy nights, start taking notes about the day and see if there are consistencies that may be affecting the peacefulness of the day.
2) Nap routines are important, and should be designed around times of the day when the parent is the most worn out. Sears suggests lying down with baby to get them used to these times, and even further suggests napping with your baby.
3) Just like the above step, consistent bedtime routines are also important. Parents should be realistic about bedtimes, considering what time parents get home from work and have dinner on the table. It is acceptable for baby to have a later bedtime--Sears suggests just giving the baby a later afternoon nap so he goes down easier at bedtime.
4) Set up fun bedtime rituals that both you and your baby can enjoy. Give the baby a nice warm bath, rock her to sleep, sing her songs, read her a book. The baby will recognize the pattern of these rituals and know after a while that these are the things that she does before bedtime.
5) Calm your baby before bedtime. Sears says "a soothing massage or warm bath is a solution for relaxing tense muscles and busy minds."
6) Keep your baby busy and wear him down before bed. The term "wear" to Sears is a literal one, where you would snuggle close to your baby or sling the baby to your body, then walk around the house with the baby. The closeness and warmth along with your movement and heartbeat can help your baby fall asleep.
7) Feed your baby right before bedtime. The routine of "warm bath to warm arms to warm breast to warm bed usually leads to sleep." Sears also says that nursing can be done by fathers in their own unique male ways. This helps the baby be comfortable in either mother's or father's arms.
8) Keep your baby close and warm until he is asleep so when you put him down, he doesn't feel like he's going to sleep alone.
9) Rocking your baby to sleep is a treasured and timeless method for helping the baby fall asleep, again because they are at a constant movement and close to your body.
10) "Create a bed on wheels." Dr. Sears recommends putting your baby in her car seat and going for a drive, that the nonstop motion "is the quickest sleep inducer," and also is a big help for mom--dads can take the babies for a drive so moms can have a moment to themselves. When arriving home, if the baby is in a deep sleep, consider keeping the baby strapped in the car seat and placing the car seat in her bed. Otherwise, if all the signs are there, transfer her to her crib gently.
Getting Your Baby to Stay Asleep
1) Sears recommends teaching your baby that daytime is for eating and nighttime is for sleeping. Babies can play so much during the day they forget to eat and then want a lot to eat right before bed. This can take a lot of time away from the parent at bedtime. Encourage a full feeding at bedtime so the baby doesn't have little "nibbles" all throughout the night.
2) Sears recommends your baby sleep on his back for the first nine months, unless your pediatrician has recommended another method.
3) Experiment with different types of infant pajamas and see which ones your baby is most comfortable in.
4) A rocking cradle versus a crib for the first few months after the baby is born is helpful. Once you've stopped rocking your baby in your arms, you can transfer the baby to the cradle and keep her rocking.
5) After you have put your baby in his bed, pat his back or bottom in a rhythmic motion and remove your hands slowly so as not to awaken the baby.
6) Make sure to even out the bedtime routine between mother and father.
7) Sears says "if you get to your baby quickly before he completely wakes up, you may be able to settle him back to sleep with a quick laying on of the hands, a cozy cuddle, or a warm nurse."
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